Honesty - the downfall of civilization?

If you get the chance, watch the most recent episode of "Bones" - The Pinocchio in the Planter (Bones - Season 6 - Episode 20). As is usual on Bones, there is a story running parallel to THE story. And it's often the interpersonal behind-the-scene stuff that makes the program so interesting.

This week is no exception. The crime leads Brennan, Booth and the others to explore a group of people devoted to "Radical Honesty." Everyone ends up trying out the new idea. Is it best to be radically honest?

Here's one scene of dialogue that does a good job of asking the question..........

Wendell: I have found that it’s a real relief to say what’s on your mind

Cam: I can see that

Wendell: I mean, I never would have gotten the job without being honest and even Hodgins pointing out my mistake has made me more careful.

Cam: I suppose that’s….. good.

Wendell: It’s liberating. For instance, a week ago, I never would have felt comfortable telling you how acrid I find your perfume.

Cam: It’s not perfume. It’s lotion and….. I like it.

(Hodgins and Angela come on the monitor – reporting in from a crime scene)…..

Hodgins: Hello all. Any more mistakes Wendell?

Wendell: I was just telling Dr. Saroyan how much more careful I am now. Perhaps it’s the monitor but you look like a flying squirrel Hodgins.

Cam: OK, that’s it. I don’t care what you do on your own time. But from now on, unless we’re talking about the evidence, I don’t want to hear one more honest word in this lab. Honesty is clearly the downfall of civilization. Civility, propriety, and manners are its redeemers, understood?

Hodgins: Loud and clear

Angela: You tell ‘em Cam

And later, when Brennan comes into the lab……..

Cam:…………. and, there’s also a new policy in the lab.

Brennan: Well, what’s that?

Cam: You are the only person who’s allowed to be radically honest. And that’s only because I can’t stop you.

Brennan: Well that’s too bad. I prefer everyone speak their minds.

Cam: I actually don’t care what you prefer because this is my lab and I make the rules.

Brennan: Then perhaps Wendell won’t be able to tell you how ashamed he felt that he might have hurt your feelings – after you were so generous to give him the extra work. He was quite emotional.

Cam: Really?

Brennan: Yes. Although I told him that I also find your lotion to be a bit pungent.

Hmmmmmm......... Interesting.On the one hand, does everyone really need to know that you don't like their lotion or that they look weird, like a flying squirrel??? On the other hand, do we want to miss hearing the honest apology from someone?

Jesus didn't seem to have a black and white rule about such things. Sometimes, people asked him questions and he just changed the subject - not answering them at all. Other times, he spoke even more than what was asked of him. There were times that he neglected to clarify something, even though it clearly left people with a wrong impression. And sometimes, he confronted people with truth. I think we're left with a need for wisdom - for how to "speak the truth" without neglecting the end of that passage, "..... in love."